Have you ever questioned God? Have you ever asked God why there is so much anxiety in your life? Why didn't my children grow up into what I prayed? Why I have more days in the month than money? Why I didn't have loving and supporting parents? Why don't I feel You moving in my life? Or maybe you've asked God why did He choose you to be His disciple? Why did He choose you to minister to His people? Why did He choose you to have a good-paying job, beautiful, successful children, a robust spiritual belief in Him, a wonderful spouse, peace all around, joy deep inside your heart? Have you ever just simply asked, WHY? “For there is no respect of persons with God”, Romans 2:11 tells us. No matter the situation we may find ourselves in, we are likely to ask God why when we have a lack of understanding or a feeling of unstableness in our lives. Maybe the problem or situation has nothing to do with us or anything we've done or failed to do. It's not about us at all! It all about Him. Colossians 1: 16-18: “For by Him were all things created, that are in heaven, and that are in earth, visible and invisible, whether they be thrones, or dominions, or principalities, or powers: all things were created by Him, and for Him: 17: And He is before all things, and by Him all things consist. 18: And He is the head of the body, the church: Who is the beginning, the first born from the dead; that in all things He might have preeminence.”
My beloved, it is normal and natural to ask God why. Jesus asked when He was on the cross, dying for the world's sins in both Matthew 27: 46 and Mark 15: 34. We just need to know that God does not often answer our questions of why. He is not in the business of explaining. He is in the business of sustaining. We will probably never know the answer to our question of why on this side of Heaven. But what we know and cling to are these truths: God is good, God is love, God is perfect, God is in control, God never makes mistakes and God cares for us. Nothing belongs to us, not even our children. Everything belongs to God. “Behold, all souls are Mine; as the soul of the Father, so also the soul of the son is Mine: the soul that sinneth, it shall die.” (Ezekiel 18:4) Throughout the Bible, we can witness the brethren questioning God from time to time. There was Moses, “Come now, therefore, and I will send thee unto Pharaoh, that thou mayest bring forth My people the children of Israel out of Egypt” (Exodus 3:10) “And Moses said unto God, who am I, That I should go unto Pharaoh, and that I should bring forth the children of Israel out of Egypt” (Exodus 3:11)
In studying the book of Job, we see the incredible power and mercy of God, in that even Satan must get permission from the Lord. Satan does not have the power to do as He pleases with us as God will set limits. It is beyond our human ability to understand the "why's" behind the suffering in the world as well as in our personal lives. We can't always blame the suffering on the sin in our lives. Suffering may sometimes be allowed in our lives to purify, to teach, or to strengthen our faith by showing us that when we have lost it all, only God remains and God is enough to sustain us! God deserves and requests our love and praise regardless of what we have in life. God will deliver all suffering believers either in this life or in that which is to come. We know that Job was a perfect man: “There was a man in the land of Uz, whose name was Job; and that man was perfect and upright, and one that feared God, and eschewed evil.” (Job 1:1) The definition of eschewed is “deliberately avoid using; abstain from.” We see later in Job where he begins to bellyache with the Lord (Job 10: 18- 19) 18: “Wherefore then hast Thou brought me forth out of the womb? Oh, that I should have given up the ghost, and no eye had seen me! 19: I should have been as though I had not been: I should have been carried from the womb to the grave.”
We cannot become so consumed with what is going on around us, be it good or bad; we must not forget that God is still large and in charge. We may see nothing but wickedness in every direction we look. Brothers and sisters, it's ok because He is in control. We will see that the wicked seem to be prospering and ask why all these difficulties when I'm walking and trying to live right. Matthew 16: 26 tells us: “For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his soul? Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?” Colossians 3: 1-2 reminds us that; 1: “If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. 2: Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth.”
In Job's case, we see where the Lord responds to his questioning and demands answers from him that it caused Job to repent. Job 40:6-10: 6: “Then answered the Lord unto Job out of a whirlwind and said. 7: Gird up thy loins now like a man: I will demand of thee and declare unto Me. 8: Wilt thou also disannul My judgment? Wilt thou condemn Me, that thou mayest be righteous? 9: Hast thou an arm like the God? Or canst thou thunder with a voice like Him? 10: Deck thyself now with majesty and excellence and array thyself with glory and beauty.” Finally, after God teaches Job a valuable lesson about His sovereignty, Job responds to the lessons from the Lord (42: 2-3), 2: “I know that Thou canst do everything, and that no thought can be withholden from Thee. 3: Who is he that hideth counsel without knowledge? Therefore, have I uttered that I understood not; things too wonderful for me, which I knew not.”
A few weeks ago while driving home and sitting at a stop sign, I heard within my spirit, "Do you know how blessed you are?” There was no audible tone, but it was as if I was in a conversation. I quickly begin answering the question by thinking about all the marvelous worldly things God has provided throughout my 50 years of life. And all of a sudden, within my spirit, I was asked again. But this time it was louder and more intense than before! "No, do you know how blessed you are?” I paused as I did not know why a second time I was asked. I sat and pondered the question well into the evening when I got home. As I reflected on being asked the question, I thought things like “I did something not to show thanks?” Did I take God for granted about something that He provided? Maybe I lack in some area of my spiritual life that He wants me to focus more on? Have I been disobedient? Am I hiding something deep within my heart that He sees, and I'm unaware of? I reflected on my day, and nothing particularly stood out. It was getting late into the night and I was still sitting in the dark on the couch, searching for an answer. Do I know how blessed I am? I began to weep because I realized that I did not know how to answer the question; so, my weeping turned to crying as I became distressed, and I found myself lacking understanding like Job.
I began to ask the Lord, why me? Why did You choose me? Why did You choose me to return safely from Afghanistan and Iraq? Why did You allow me to humble myself to bow before You to ask for repentance of my soul? I could have been…, I should have been…, but You baptized me, You sanctified me, You filled me with the gift of the Holy Ghost. I'm blessed because of You, Lord. Lord, all I know is, because of you, I live. Father, you told Moses to tell the children of Israel "I AM THAT I AM" when they ask for the name of Who sent him. Other than that, the answer was no; I don't know how blessed I am. I thank You for all that You have done, Lord Jesus, by saving my soul from the depths of hell. Lord, I thank You for giving me peace while still here on earth. Thank you for giving me the desire to serve you, Lord. Thank You for permitting me to bow down before You and call you Father, Lord Jesus. Thank You for being the compass in my life; I thank You for the promise that what will come if I hold on until the end. I know you have no respect of persons and for many are called but few are chosen. Romans 14:11 tells us that “For it is written, As I live, saith the Lord, every knee shall bow to Me, every tongue shall confess to God.”
I sat in the dark, in silence and fearing what was next to come. My heart filled with anguish, waiting on an answer from the Lord; I heard nothing. I wiped my tears and looked around, not in fear but with the determination to get this right. I was prepared to wrestle like Jacob (Genesis 32: 24- 26), 24: “And Jacob was left alone; and there wrestled a man with him until the breaking of the day. 25: And when he saw that he prevailed not against him, he touched the hollow of his thigh; and the hollow of Jacob's thigh was out of joint, as he wrestled with him. 26: And he said, Let me go, for the day breaketh. And he said, I will not let thee go, except thou bless me.”
I needed to get the question answered with the Lord's approval. I had no idea what the right answer could be, and I was willing to go all night trying to get it right. I waited, but nothing. I share this story with you because of the heart's satisfaction and tears of joy (yes, I am crying right now). I am still moved from the experience to this day, just thinking about it. Of all the billions of people on earth, the Lord thought of me and wanted me to know it. He could have passed me by and let me be. But He decided to communicate with me through the Spirit. I do not know if I got the answer right, but I know that the following scriptures are for you and me as true believers and partakers of faith:
Jeremiah 29: 11 “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not evil, to give you an expected end.”
Romans 8: 28 “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose.”
Isaiah 55: 8-9 “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts”.
Corinthians 2: 16 “For who hath known the mind of the Lord, that he may instruct Him? But we have the mind of Christ.”
Hebrews 11: 6 “But without faith, it is impossible to please Him: for he that cometh to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of them that diligently seek Him.”
1 Corinthians 2: 12 “Now we have received not the Spirit of the world, but the Spirit Who is from God, that we might understand the things freely given us by God.”
I will close with this, we can ask the Father all we want about our current status here on earth, but He is not required to answer us. He doesn't owe us an answer or anything for that matter, and that is fine. I pray our current circumstances do not consume us, regardless if it be good or bad in our eyes. I pray that we continue to press to the mark. (Philippians 3: 14 -21): 14: “I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. 15: Let us therefore, as many as be perfect, be thus minded: and if in anything ye be otherwise minded, God shall reveal even this unto you. 16: Nevertheless, whereto we have already attained, let us walk by the same rule, let us mind the same thing. 17: Brethren be followers together of me and mark them which walk so as ye have us for an ensample. 18: For many walk, of whom I have told you often, and now tell you even weeping, that they are the enemies of the cross of Christ. 19: Whose end is destruction, whose God is their belly, and whose glory is in their shame, who mind earthly things. 20: For our conversation is in heaven; from whence also we look for the Saviour, the Lord Jesus Christ: 21: Who shall change our vile body, that it may be fashioned like unto His glorious body, according to the working whereby He is able even to subdue all things unto Himself.”
Brothers and sisters, please continue to pray for me as I pray for you all. Please keep holding on, and don't give up the fight. The Lord is on our side, and the victory is His. We don't worry about not understanding the WHY in our lives; just know that you and I were chosen for that WHY and He will get the glory from its outcome. I love every one of you, and I earnestly pray that God continues to be the light within you until we are all called home. (Revelation 7: 13-17) 13: “And one of the elders answered, saying unto me, what are these which are arrayed in white robes? And whence came they? 14: And I said unto Him, Sir, thou knowest. And he said to me, These are they which came out of great tribulation, and have washed their robes, and made them white in the blood of the Lamb. 15: Therefore are they before the throne of God and serve Him day and night in the temple: and He that sitteth on the throne shall dwell among them. 16: They shall hunger no more, neither thirst any more; neither shall the sun light on them nor any heat. 17: For the Lamb which is in the midst of the throne shall feed them and shall lead them unto living fountains of water: and God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes.”
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